Thursday, January 22, 2009

One week.

My heart has been heavy all day. But filled with sweet reminders of how lucky we are to have this baby growing inside of me as he just kicked as I'm writing this journal entry. It was a week ago today that we found out Isaac will be born with Anencephaly. I dream of how long he'll live, hoping for a couple hours instead of just minutes. I've thought about the past 7 days, and have been grateful to see the progress the children have made in their grief. They truly are amazing. How Andrew and I love them! I've been thinking about how I need to force myself to shop for the baby's outfits - what I'll dress him in at the hospital, and what we'll bury him in. I can't bring myself to do it yet. As the days pass I feel more confidant in my ability to live with this trial, and am slowly returning to my household duties. I've planned dinner this evening. Big step for me. Andrew has worked the week well, and has been a top performer at work. He's a strong, good man. He loves to touch my belly for "good luck" he says. I'm not used to being touched so much, but this is his boy, too - - I can share! The children have transitioned back into school well, and have the support of very loving teachers, whom we are amazingly gratful for. I've thought of the baby's name often this week: Isaac Brighman Nielson. We decided on the name Isaac months before we knew we were pregnant. It reminds me of the story of Abraham and Isaac, Abraham being willing to lay his child's life at the Lord's feet. We've been asked to do the same, and will do so, bring grateful to our Father for giving us time with this sweet and perfect spirit.

8 comments:

Holly said...

The comparison of Abraham laying his child before the Lord, just as you will do, is a beautiful if heartbreaking thought Misty. Isaac is well named. Your strength amazes me.

Gavin said...

Ah, love, you are so amazing. I am in awe of how you have embraced all this and are trying to work through it, the burden is heavy, yet you have straightened your back to carry the extra load. I love you and pray for you and your family. xoxoxo

Ashley said...

I don't know you and you don't know me. I just wanted to leave you a note that I just sent up a prayer for you and your family.

Marie said...

Beautiful post Misty. I love the name Isaac. It suits so well. Praying as always. XXOO

Eliot's Mom said...

Beautiful. I thought of that scriptural link earlier this week. That story will be all the sweeter to me whenever I come across it now. And yes, Andrew is a good, strong man, your children are amazingly resilient, and you are inspiring. We love you. All 6 of you.

Kami said...

Misty, your strength is amazing. I am sure I have said it before but I'll say it again. In the face of adversity, you stick out your tongue and plow through.

We got your back girl!

Blogs by Danielle said...

When you can, will you please email me? I cannot find your email address.

blogsbydanielle@gmail.com

Blessings to you and your family, and your sweet, precious little baby.

Danielle

Anonymous said...

Misty The strenght you have is amazing! You are such a wonderful woman. Your Husband and Children are truely blessed to have you, as are you to have them at this trying time. I am so glad that the kids will find comfort in their animals they made. They will have them forever. It's amazing to me that you can get here and write as often as you do... such strength. Love you Misty. XOXO ~Brookie~